Purpose and Plans

“Look,” he said, weary from all the unknowns, “Let’s let Aaro finish his assignment.”

His words stopped me dead in my tracks. It was as if someone had snapped the music off right in the middle of a crazy song with the volume turned up high.

Huh?

I had never thought about it like that. But my husband, Steven’s exhortation that afternoon, as we sat in the car in the church parking lot together hit me square in the face. 

His words breathed hope into my weary soul and I eagerly welcomed this new perspective. I sat there for a few moments and pondered this idea, and I suddenly felt my furrowed brow shape into delight.

Could Aaro at the tender age of 14- almost 15 months- have a God-given “assignment” in the orphanage where he is being cared for? Being used by the Lord in ways his little mind and heart don’t even know? 

I don’t know, truthfully.

But I began to wonder what if. My desperate heart raced with possibilities…

What if God has placed our son at this orphanage “for such a time as this”, using him to be a light to Indians for His glory? What if Aaro’s “assignment” is much bigger than coming to America yet? 

He is currently living in a city in India that has over 500 unreached people groups. If the prayers that we are praying daily over our son are actually being answered, and God is indeed covering him with His Presence and making him a light in the darkness, as we have asked of the Lord- then what kind of Kingdom impact might Aaro be having even now? 

I. Don’t. Know. 

How could we possibly know?

But what if? 

I absolutely fell in love with the idea of it! And it has since changed my perspective entirely. My prayers have even started to shift- now I am focused more than ever on the people that he is interacting with! And the caregivers whom we will get to meet again when we go get him. 

While we are not claiming that Aaro is yet a born-again believer and able to share the gospel in a verbal way, we are choosing to look for the bigger purposes and plans at work here as we wait to be reunited with our son. After all, the Lord had a special plan for John the Baptist when He filled him with His Spirit even when he was in his mother’s womb! (Luke 1:15) God's ways are mysterious and much bigger and more complex than we can see or know. 

↠ Maybe Aaro's “assignment” is about the relationships that will open up gospel doors for him years down the road?

↠ Maybe miracles are happening that we don’t even know about that are pointing doctors to God as Healer? 

↠ Perhaps Aaro will open up opportunities for us to minister to others that have been an important part of his life thus far? 

↠ Or maybe he is bringing a special love and meaning to someone else’s life that cares for him day in and day out and is treasuring every single day she gets to hold him and love on him?

↠ Maybe he is the light and joy of another child’s life, helping him or her to get through each and every day facing the difficulties of a special need? Or perhaps another child or adult means the world to our son and brings him joy each and every day?

How can we know? 

We may never see the results of this wait or the meaning behind any of it. We may never get any answers. 

But what if? What if his time in an Indian orphanage for 15 + months will serve more of a purpose and Kingdom impact than ever meets the eye? 

COURT UPDATE

Our next scheduled court hearing was supposed to be today, July 17th, and many of you have been so kind to let us know that you have been praying for us for this date. But it seems that our hearing may have occurred earlier than anticipated (last week)... and once again reported to have been unattended by important parties. Sigh. It would seem that our next (7th) court date is now scheduled for August.

This court process is stupid and I am mad. 

Says my inner 3-year old self who would like to throw a tantrum about this infuriating process and do any and everything I can to get somebody’s attention and try to get my way! 

However, my 30-year old version, who has spent countless hours with Jesus through this difficult process probably has another response to it. 

We are certainly weary from the ups & downs and we cannot keep up with all the crazy in this court process. It’s hard to know what to believe and how to pray. And we don't know how to answer people anymore when they ask us how the adoption process is going. But we will continue to pray to our God who is intimately involved in this journey and trust Him with the timeline of bringing Aaro home. We know that He wants us to be a forever family, too. He loves our son more than we could ever hope to. We continue to pray for the joy of the Lord to be our strength and for encouragement when we feel hopeless; and He has been faithful to do all of this and more. 

CHOOSING JOY

And as we wait, we look for all the things that God is doing; all the blessings happening everywhere we turn. I’m taking pictures of moments and writing down things I’m grateful for. Because the truth is, my temptation is to just deem this entire waiting season as frustrating, difficult, painful, and wearying. 
And while each of these descriptors accurately depict much of this wretched waiting period- they don’t get to steal the show or paint the whole picture! Sure, I’ve spent many hours privately grieving and many moments feeling hopeless and angry; but I desperately want to reclaim all the good that is here, too in this season and thank God for all the ways He is working. I don’t want to look back on this process of getting to my child and wonder who I became along the way. I want to become the healthiest I can be in these months of preparation- spiritually, physically, mentally, and emotionally. Aaro deserves a Mom who is healthy and stable. And the reality is: it takes an intentional effort to fight all the frustration inside me with purposeful JOY and HOPE. 

"My hope comes from the lord, the maker of heaven and earth.” (Psalm 121:2)

PRAYER REQUESTS

And we certainly need the prayers of others because admittedly, there’s a difference between being sanctified and going insane. Personally, I want to look more like Jesus because of this waiting season than a mental patient. 😅 
Sanctification yields healthy fruit. That is what I want and I have to carefully and submissively choose the path that leads to it. 

So we invite others to continue laboring with us in prayer. We see and feel the very real spiritual warfare in this journey to getting our son, and we need an army of prayer warriors to continue coming alongside us.

Will you join us in praying for favor with the judge? 

For paperwork miracles? 

For strength & peace? 

For Aaro’s health? 

For his caregivers and all the volunteers working with him?

For his “assignment” to be fulfilled exactly as God intends... and for his Mama & Daddy to gracefully and obediently submit to its timeframe?

“In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God. And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:26-28